| Answering
the Cosmic "CALL" Takes a Leap of Faith
by Jan Henrikson
I’ve always been curious about “THE CALL”
that others have experienced in their lives – the one
that seems to disclose complete directions as to where the
recipient needs to go in life and exactly what they need to
do to get there. What was it like? When did it come? How did
they know it was THE call? Would it ever happen to me? Oh,
the patience I’ve practiced, and the trust I’ve
cultivated, surrendering to the life I do have and trusting
that everything is in divine order JUST AS IT IS, even without
having received “THE CALL” myself.
My Mom used to tease me as I sat watching out the window
for my boyfriend to pick me up – sometimes for 45 minutes
fully dressed in all my winter gear! “A watched kettle
never boils!” she used to gently say. And I’d
give her one of my teenage, “What the heck does that
mean?” looks, impatient and frustrated and finding no
comfort in her words. I understand now, of course, and try
not to watch and wonder, but it gets especially challenging
when others around you get their call, when their kettle boils.
Have you experienced “The Call”? The one that
seems to ignite the spark of action that catapults you beyond
your categorical, logical mind into taking actions that move
you beyond your comfort zone and facilitate growth and expansion
and a total release of previously held limitations. The call
that seems to awaken an inner being that hasn’t bought
into doubt and fear, and hasn’t absorbed the negative
influences of our society. The one that awakens the self that
doesn’t operate from a practical, logical place based
on previous experience but resides so deep within you that
you cannot deny its gentle, loving presence and clear voice.
You never know when it will happen, until it does. And then
you know – in every cell of your being … at every
level of consciousness – that a piece of your life’s
puzzle has just slipped neatly into place. And effortlessly
– at least at the beginning – you fall into step
in the great cosmic dance of your life, divinely choreographed
by the great unseen force in our lives that we long to surrender
to, have faith in, and trust. These expanded moments that
we experience on our path contain the magic that “cleans
the mirror of the heart so it can clearly reflect what is
already within us.” We then get a glimplse of the truth
of who we are, the potential we carry and a vision of what
our purpose is.
That is what happened to me when I visited the Jivamukti
Yoga website for the first time. I never could have planned
to have an illuminated, ecstatic moment while sitting at a
computer, that’s for sure! In fact, most of my rational
mind is still trying to convince me that I didn’t have
it, ‘cause, after all, I wasn’t meditating or
at one with nature or standing on my head or hiking the Himalayas
or chanting in a temple in India or doing something appropriate
to warrant receipt of such a call! But it was coming through
and I was picking it up! And no amount of interference from
my patterned way of thinking had a hope of disconnecting the
line I had magically hooked up to. That night, everything
unfolded just for me - the colours, the lotus flowers, the
teacher training pop-up, Martin Luther King Jr.’s face
and voice popping into my consciousness - “The time
is now!” Time was suspended and it was just me and the
screen and, the “Knowing.”
Complete absence of doubt - that’s definitely one
of the characteristics of the call I got that night. I didn’t
audibly “hear” a voice but on every level of my
being I experienced the inner guidance that lovingly, clearly,
and confidently directed the next step in the dance of my
life, which is to attend the Jivamukti Yoga Teacher Training
Intensive in Austria this September.
Another characteristic is that this step is not something
I’d typically do [“You want me to do WHAT?”],
nor does it make rational sense in many ways. So far there’s
been at least a vein of rationality to the direction –
enough for my rational mind to at least consider the possibility,
but there are more strikes “against” the action
than “for,” such as, “Why would you go half
way round the world and spend US$6,000 for a month of training?
Surely you could find something closer, cheaper, less intense,
more gradual, easier, more normal, different, and better!”
It is definitely a choice we make as to which “voice”
we listen to. If we take the time in our lives to listen regularly
we gain insight and clarity as to which voices are in the
game, and we develop discernment as to which ones are on our
cheerleading squad and which ones are actually the opposition!
Part of my process prior to picking up that cosmic call
was a realization that occurred last winter while taking the
course, “Walking in This World” by Julia Cameron
(author of The Artist’s Way), taught by Jacqueline Gautier.
I discovered that what I refer to as my “self-sabotage
voice” actually had very practical and rational tones
to it! I had expected it to sound mean and negative. How often
have I listened to that practical voice? Yikes! Lots! And
I don’t know how many times I must have disconnected
the “kind and friendly” – though not logical
– voice that lovingly directs my true path (I’m
sure there have been many). What I do know is that this time
I stayed on the line and listened. I’m following the
path of my heart, taking a big leap of faith, and flying across
the chasm [in this case, the ocean!] of doubt, fear, and uncertainty,
and following the lead of my divine dance partner and choreographer.
I don’t know what the next step will be nor am I trying
to figure that out [thank goodness!]. Again, what I do know
is that anything is possible, anything is probable, that dreams
do come true, and that I can fly! And so can you! So, take
the leap, the net will appear!
I am deeply grateful for all the loving guidance and support
that I have received throughout this process – the communities
of human angels who have danced with me every step of the
way, and the unseen ones who hold my hand during those dark
plunges into the pools of fear and doubt that lie in the shadowlands
of my subconscious, waiting for moments just like these to
surface and be healed, and set my true self free! Namaste.
Jan Henrikson, upon her return
from Austria, will be teaching yoga at The Refinery in Saskatoon
starting at the beginning of October 2003. For further information
please contact Cynthia at The Refinery (306) 653-3549 or Jan
at (306) 244-4776. |
